When jokes

Why can orphans stay out until whatever time?

Because their parents won't tell them when to come home.

In geometry class, the teacher went up to the board and drew a 23-degree angle.

She then drew a 67-degree angle. The class was astonished when the angles started talking! The first one said, "That's a lovely blouse you're wearing," and the second one chimed in, "And I love what you've done with your hair."

The students asked the teacher if she knew what was going on. She sighed and said, "Well, these angles are supposed to be complementary, but I guess they don't know how to spell."

What do you say to your sister when she's crying?

"Are you having a crisis because people say 67?"

Yo momma so slutty, when she got a throat swab, the lab found eight different types of semen on her tonsils.

I am so cool that even the fridge or a snowman would shiver his timbers when they see me :).

What does Bugs Bunny say when he has a boner?

"What's up, cock?"

How are rape and airplanes similar?

The ride gets more annoying when the kid starts screaming.

How are rape and airplanes similar?

The ride gets more annoying when the kid starts screaming.

What does Bugs Bunny say when he has a boner?

"What's up, cock?"

When you're asked to tell a crazy story, but the first thing that comes up to your mind is a suicide attempt:

"Oh, I don't remember anything in particular. 😅😀"

I don't get people who treat you like shit and cross your boundaries, then are surprised when you have depression.

It's because of them after all. 🥰✨️

The Hodja purchased a piece of meat at the market, and on his way home he met a friend.

Seeing the Hodja's purchase, the friend told him an excellent recipe for stew.

"I'll forget it for sure," said the Hodja. "Write it on a piece of paper for me."

The friend obliged him, and the Hodja continued on his way, the piece of meat in one hand and the recipe in the other. He had not walked far when suddenly a large hawk swooped down from the sky, snatched the meat, and flew away with it.

"It will do you no good!" shouted the Hodja after the disappearing hawk. "I still have the recipe!"

When Sally was little, she came home from school and said to her mother, "Mom, I can't believe it! Little John collects Pimmel at school."

Mom: "No?"

"Like in heaven?" said the mother.

"No, juice," Sally said.

If possible, I refrain from brunching celebrities. My path is smooth. The table receives the branching.

When I arrived at my friend's house and, after a long time, I was given permission to pick from the branches and graze the dog, I agreed. Then the work begins. "No, no money," I replied, "that's why I'm a burden to the world that hurts me."

And when I told them, they told me and said they were there. If I had a job, I would be fired on the first day for bad behavior. The best solution is to avoid this situation.

Fritzchen was supposed to remember three sentences. He asks his mother, "Mom, do you have any news?" The mother replies angrily, "Stop it!"

Fritzchen goes to see his father, who is watching a football match. When a goal is scored, he shouts, "That's it!"

Finally, he asks his sister, "Sister, do you have anything to say?" She is currently reading a story about a fool and says, "He is the dumbest person in the world!"

The next day at school, the teacher asks, "Fritzchen, did you learn the phrases?" Fritzchen replies, "Stop it!" The teacher is shocked: "Fritzchen! Don't say that to me. Go to the principal immediately!" Fritzchen shouts, "That's it!" Arriving at the principal's office, he asks, "Who do you think I am?" Fritzchen promptly replies, "He's the dumbest person in the world!"

What’s the best song to play when visiting Africa?

"Have You Ever Seen the Rain?"

Q: What's the difference between Jeffrey Epstein and wind chimes?

A: Wind chimes don't make a gurgling sound when they're hung.

Donald Trump travels back in time to talk to his 10-year-old self.

When he sees himself, he says, "Do you see me? I am you, but almost 70 years older."

His 10-year-old self asks him, "Am I going to be famous?"

Trump replies, "Oh yeah, I became president of the United States. Not once. Twice!"

10-year-old Donald was shocked. But he became even more shocked when he heard the next sentence from his current self: "And now take off your pants!"

What did the Indian say when the pizza was delivered to him?

"Hey! Who puked on the frybread?"

I remember when I saw my dad's penis for the first time.

I said, "Dad, don't text me shit like that."