mr tinted

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you know that feeling when your going throught a school parking lot and go over a speed bump then you realize that there are no speed bumps

i really wasnt planning on going for a run today, but damn those cops came put of nowhere’s

do you ever get that feeling where your just going through a school parking lot, then you realize that there are no parking lots

yall really need to stop hating on pedos!! At least they drive slow in school zones! god.

why did the orphan have to eat his cereal with water?

Because his dad never came back with the milk

this isnt really a joke but true.. you picture for your funeral may have already been taken :)

ahem.. if somebody you dont like, or somebody random just calls you in general,

answer the phone with this

Hello thank you for choosing mamas pizzeria/ abortion clinic, your loss is our sauce how may i help you?

or

hello this is davids orphanage you make them we take them how may i help you?

some people reactions are priceless and then the wonder about you mental health