Your forehead [is] so big that if I drew an H on it, Kobe could have landed there.
mr tinted
You know that feeling when you're going through a school parking lot and go over a speed bump, then you realize that there are no speed bumps?
I really wasn't planning on going for a run today, but damn, those cops came out of nowhere!
the only joke here is the topic
This website is darker than the kid that got arrested last week.
Do you ever get that feeling where you're just going through a school parking lot, then you realize that there are no parking lots?
Y'all really need to stop hating on pedos!! At least they drive slow in school zones! God.
So, my son is into astronomy, and he asked how stars die. I said, "Usually overdose."
What's the 9/11 survivors' least favorite team?
New York Jets.
what do you call a virgin from alabama
an orphan
Why did the orphan have to eat his cereal with water?
Because his dad never came back with the milk.
This isn't really a joke, but it's true. Your picture for your funeral may have already been taken :)
Lol, I have no life :)
Ahem... if somebody you don't like, or somebody random just calls you in general,
answer the phone with this:
"Hello, thank you for choosing Mama's Pizzeria/Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce, how may I help you?"
or
"Hello, this is David's Orphanage, you make them, we take them, how may I help you?"
Some people's reactions are priceless, and then they wonder about your mental health.