1. My phone battery lasts longer than your relationships.
2. Oh you’re talking to me, I thought you only talked behind my back.
3. My name must taste good because it’s always in your mouth.
Do you wanna hear the gossip about butter?
Actually I shouldn't spread it.
I'm shocked about Donald Trump escaping the transgender accusations. Trump is more talkative than any of the popular girls I went to school with! Not to mention Trump's tweets....
Literally every movie:
"I love you" "I love u too"
My life:
My 'friends': "Hey, Hailey likes u!" Him: "wtf I have a grilfriend sorry not sorry" His friends: Spreads the word throughout the whole goddamn country". 😶
Did you hear the gossip about butter? Never mind, I butter not spread it...
What is the fastest way to spread a rumor? Telephone? NO. Television? No. How then? Tell A Woman
How do you trick a homophobic heterosexual male that is a roman catholic priest into using the glory hole inside the men's restroom at a gay bar? Tell him that it is a confessional booth
So one day I was walking home from school with my best friend sally. She was worried to get home because she was going to tell her mom that bob the class rep got her pregnant a eight months ago and now it was obvious she was pregnant. So I said “sally it’ll be ok I’m sure she’ll be happy to get a grandson” “yeah thanks suzy” she said to me then went into her house. The next few weeks she didn’t show up to school so I was like oh she must be in trouble with her mom I’ll go check on her So I walk up to her house and her mom answers with a baby boy in her hands “oh hello. Is that Sally’s son!! Can I see sally?” Her mom says sure and I go inside but she leads me to the backyard and I see a tombstone “here lies sally 2004-2020” so I ask her mom in tears “oh did she not make it through the birth?” And her mom replied “you could say that..”
Have you heard the gossip about the butter? Oh I guess I better not spread it.
