Weapon jokes
What do you call a baby on the battlefield?
Free shield!
We gotta keep it goin' ▄【デc̷a̷t̷══━一.
▄【デc̷a̷t̷══━一.
Spread the cat gun.
Are you happy to see me, or is that a bomb strapped to your chest and a detonator in your hand?
A B C D E F GUN.
What do you call a kid with 15 nukes and a shotgun?
The final countdown.
America: "WE NEED MORE AMMO!"
Japan: "We are the ammo."
Imagine being expelled from school for bringing a weapon to school.
What does a baby and a grenade have in common?
They both make noise after you throw them.
Why do most clips for automatic weapons have 32 bullets?
That's usually how many kids are in a classroom.
There's this smart way to sneak a calculator into school. I've heard of it. You take the calculator, put it in a gun magazine, put the magazine in the gun, and bring the gun to school!
Who would win in a fight, in a boxing ring? Mike Tyson or Helen Keller with a Tommy gun?
Mike Tyson. Helen Keller never heard the bell.
A suicidal customer walks into a gun store.
Cashier: Is this your final purchase?
Customer: Actually, yes it is!
What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you?
You pull the pin and throw it back!
How do you punish a blind person?
Hand them a gun and tell them it’s a hairdryer.
What do you call a suicide bomber in a wheelchair?
An RC-XD.
What’s the difference between a feminist and a suicidal vest?
A suicidal vest actually works when triggered.
What's the rarest gun you can find in Africa? A water gun.
What's a lesbian's favorite weapon?
A finger gun.
What does a knife have but not my life...
A point.