Weapon jokes
I finally got a girlfriend.
Her name is Remington Model 32.
What's a knife's favorite person?
The victim.
Women are like grenades: you pull the ring and BOOM, the house is gone!
"Knife to meet you all!"
What is your arm's favorite military branch? The army.
Memes
What did the bomber say to the jet?
"Sorry bro, I gotta bomb."
*WAIT NO-*
What do a baby and a grenade have in common? They both make loud noises when thrown.
Bomb.
When you get caught about to shoot up the school,
*slowly puts AR to chin*
When you steal the weird pet rock, so he pulls out his pet Glock.
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair? A TANK!
What’s the rarest gun to find in Africa?
A water gun...
I heard guns kill people, so I gave up my right to own one.
Then I heard dicks rape people, so I chopped it off.
"Ching chong, drop the bomb!"
Why did the little boy cross the road multiple times?
He stepped on an IED after being mutilated on a chopping block that was on fire with a table saw and multiple gallows which were infested with flaming termites with splotches of blood all over him from his eyes after they were squashed with a brick.
I’m not racist. I just have black guns.
How do you break up blind people in a fight? Scream, "I put my money on the guy with the knife!"
What do LGBTQ+ people use as a weapon in THG (The Hunger Games)?
A rainbow.
When your friend does a finger-gun and his dad appears behind him and does it too, with the real deal!
Are you happy to see me, or is that a bomb strapped to your chest and a detonator in your hand?