War jokes

"Ukraine be like Escape to Witch Mountain!"

What was one cool thing about Hitler?

He used to paint his thoughts on the wall with a gun.

Q: What’s the worst thing about breaking up with a Japanese girl?

A: You have to drop the bomb twice before she gets the message.

What do you call a Taliban in a bath bomb?

Where did Suzy go during the bombing?

Everywhere.

Q: Why is Japan the healthiest country?

A: Last time they had a fat man, 80,000 people died.

Your race's favorite Star Wars Characters:

Arab...Admiral Ackbar (Allahu Akbar)

East Asian...Qui-Gon Jinn (Ching-Chong-Wing-Wong)

Jew...Rey (Ray)

Black...BB-8 (BBC)

Italian...Jabba the Hutt (Pizza Hut)

German...Admiral Piett (Hitler)

What do you call a country with nukes?

Abomination.

What's the difference between a toaster and a ten-year-old Chinese girl? A Japanese soldier would regret sticking his d*ck into a toaster.

Let me tell you how I escaped Iraq. Iran! (;)

Two of my grandpas died in WW2.

Their tower fell over.

So, I was watching YouTube, and then my friend says, "Those videos never get old." I replied, "Just like a Make-A-Wish kid." After I said that, he shot me in the head and said, "And now neither do you." Now I’m in Heaven, and God says to me, "Welcome to Paradise where it is summer days, clear skies," and I said, "Are there summer women?" Now here I am in Hell with my buddy Hitler. I believe he’s a hero after he killed Hitler.

What do you call a blind German?

A Nazi (not see).

What’s the difference between Usain Bolt and Hitler?

Usain finished the races.

What is a terrorist's DJ name?

Osama Spin Laden Dropping beats like the Twin Towers!

Why does Adolf hate golf?

He ended up in the bunker.

What is the difference between Hitler and Usain Bolt?

Usain Bolt can finish a race.

What’s Hitler’s favorite letter?

Not Z.

Where did Sora go during Nagasaki?

Everywhere.

"If your enemy is kicking your ass, blame it on the lag."

-- Sun Tzu, The Art of War