War

War jokes

Stalin

Stalin asked Hitler if he wants to hear a joke.

Hitler says, “Yes.”

Stalin then says, “Moscow.” Hitler replies with “I don’t get it?”

Stalin laughs for a long time and says, “And you never will.”

Lard

What's full of lard and is reserved as Putin's cannon fodder?

Your mum!!!

Fandom

Apex Legends: exists.

Titanfall fandom: (Literally on fire and at war with itself) "Everything is fine."

Memes

Hitler

Why can’t Hitler join the track? Because he can’t even finish a race.

Iran

Iran: Prepare the FINAL SOLUTION.

Israel: And you'll be telling the whole world, "I-RAN AWAY!"

Hairline

Your hairline is so far back that it looks like Putin's tanks steamrolled through.

Negotiation

How would negotiations between Putin and Zelensky play out?

QUEUE THE MUSIC

BANG BANG INTO THE ROOM I KNOW U WANT IT

Grandfather

Teacher: Tell me a moral story.

Little Johnny: Once my grandfather was in WW2. He saw everyone praising to kill him. For example, we should sneak up and kill him. We get the helicopter above and shoot him from there. My grandfather heard this, he got his gun and shot them all.

Teacher: What is the moral even?

Little Johnny: Never plan to kill my grandfather.

School

When you kill people in a war, it's perfectly fine, but when it's a school, everyone has a problem with it, wth.

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  • Orphan

    Why can't an orphan role-play Star Wars?

    Because they have no one to play Darth Vader.

    Minefield

    Officer: "Stay back soldiers, minefield!"

    Soldier: "Let's clear the field!"

    Officer: "Ok!"

    *silence*

    *explosion*