Violence jokes
What do you do when you finish a magazine at the hospital?
You reload and keep shooting.
I was hit on by President Kennedy, too bad I shot him down.
Don't you just want to go on a mass murder while listening to goodbye Moonman? Oh, just me... OK.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to have a little fun.
Jack got mad and kicked Jill in the ass because she couldn't make him cum.
Why did Tyrone drop his ice cream cone?
A: He got shot.
Why did the bank robber shoot the man with no arms?
Because he told the man to put his hands up.
When the school shooter is right outside the classroom window, and the autistic kid starts trying to say hello to him.
Teacher: What's 3 minus 1? Me: I don't know. Teacher: How about this, you have three cakes, I take one. How many cakes do you have? Me: Three. Teacher: If I take one cake from your three, what do you have? Me: Three cakes and a dead teacher.
I never get school shooting jokes.
Maybe they're aimed at a younger audience.
Did you hear about the cannibal who passed his brother in the woods?
What are some other names for rape? There’s the classic “struggle snuggle,” but then there’s my personal favorite “fuck fight”.
I don't understand why, when I went to the shooting range today, the police came. Like, bro, I always go to elementary schools.
Why wasn't the infant's entire body found?
Because the limbs are scattered around 43°17.7355’N, 113°58.4205’W.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I have no balls, neither will you. 🔪🔪
How to respond if someone starts looking at the photos on your phone.
Step 1: Jab your thumbs into their eye sockets.
My teacher said, "I'm gonna leave soon, I don't want to be here anymore!" So I shot her.
Hickory dickory dock. My wife avoids my cock. She's losing her and having an affair. So I had to slap Chris Rock.
There was this girl on the street that had no arms and no legs. She looked at me and said, “Hey sir, I’ve never been fucked before, will you fuck me?” So I threw her in the ocean and said, “Well, you’re fucked now.”
What has four legs and one arm?
A Rottweiler in a children’s playground.
I bought my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday.
He said it was the most violent book he’s ever read.