Violence jokes

Don't you just want to go on a mass murder while listening to goodbye Moonman? Oh, just me... OK.

The other day I started watching Game of Thrones.

I told my friend about it. Told him all about the violence, murder, decapitation, gore, sex, gay sex, midget sex, prostitution, rape, paedophilia, incest, and inbreeding... And he was like: "Oh, so you're still on the first episode then?"

How do you avoid getting raped? Just don't say no!

Why did Tyrone drop his ice cream cone?

A: He got shot.

What do you call a kid with no friends?

A Sandy Hook survivor.

I never get school shooting jokes.

Maybe they're aimed at a younger audience.

Teacher: What's 3 minus 1? Me: I don't know. Teacher: How about this, you have three cakes, I take one. How many cakes do you have? Me: Three. Teacher: If I take one cake from your three, what do you have? Me: Three cakes and a dead teacher.

When the school shooter is right outside the classroom window, and the autistic kid starts trying to say hello to him.

Why did Billy fall off his bike?

Because his dad threw a chair at him.

Did you hear about the cannibal who passed his brother in the woods?

What are some other names for rape? There’s the classic “struggle snuggle,” but then there’s my personal favorite “fuck fight”.

Someone said to stop hurting myself, but I'm still trying to cut my arms off.

How to respond if someone starts looking at the photos on your phone.

Step 1: Jab your thumbs into their eye sockets.

So, there was this girl on the street that had no arms or legs, that said "Hey sir, I've never been fucked before, will you do the honors and fuck me?" So, I threw her in the ocean and said "Well, your fucked now."

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have no balls, neither will you. 🔪🔪

Fortnite is just like high school. You get off the bus and start shooting everybody.

My teacher said, "I'm gonna leave soon, I don't want to be here anymore!" So I shot her.

Why wasn't the infant's entire body found?

Because the limbs are scattered around 43°17.7355’N, 113°58.4205’W.

I was told to burn calories, so I threw your mom in the fire.

I bought my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday.

He said it was the most violent book he’s ever read.