Violence jokes
Someone said to stop hurting myself, but I'm still trying to cut my arms off.
An apple a day can do so much more than keep the doctor away... it can keep ANYONE away.
if you throw it hard enough.
What do you call a kid with no friends?
A Sandy Hook survivor.
Serial murderer Ed Gein was famed for raping, killing, and skinning his victims.
When he was asked why he did it, he responded, "You don't know someone until you walk around in their skin."
I would never kill an animal. I'm more of a people person.
What is red and goes 200 miles per hour?
A baby in a blender.
Q. What do you call a gun that rapes someone?
A. An assault rifle.
99% of women kiss with their eyes closed, that's why it's so hard to identify the rapist.
What's the difference between a man and a table?
The table doesn't cry when I break its legs.
I would make a rape joke, but I'd have to force it down your throat.
What’s the difference between a hundred decapitated babies and a Ferrari? I don’t have a Ferrari in my garage.
Q: What's the hardest thing about losing your virginity?
A: Making sure she doesn't wake up.
How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles?
You nail its other hand to the ground.
Someone in London is stabbed every two minutes. Poor guy.
What do you do when you finish a magazine at the hospital?
Reload and keep shooting.
Rape is a touchy subject.
When the school shooter throws a smoke bomb into the classroom, and the autistic kid thinks it's a dance party.
Mary had a little lamb. Chick, chick, bam! No more lamb.
I was going to make a rape joke, but I don’t think you would’ve given me consent.
If you kill an orphan, would that count as a squad wipe?