Violence jokes
Pickup line; Hey mama, you school? Cuz I'd like to shoot some kids up in you.
Teachers at a school shooting be like: damn it. That's the third one this week and it's only Monday.
When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat children into the fire.
What did the little boy say to the fat man?
How many Japs did you get?
How do you make rape funny? Tickle her while you do it.
What's the best thing about abuse jokes? The punchline.
No means no, but if you use chloroform, it’s a guaranteed yes.
Someone at school judged my grammar.
I judged theirs by the terms "school" and "rifle range" being mixed up the next day.
This one kid never stands up for the pledge of allegiance, and I'm tired of it.
Today, I push him out of his wheelchair.
Why did Billy fall off his bike?
Because his dad threw a chair at him.
If you want to pick on someone, pick on orphans. Let them tell their parents.
Double!
Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere!
Triple!
Why did Bob cross the road? Because he wasn't wearing his seatbelt.
According to statistics, 5 of 6 people enjoy gang rape.
What did the soldier say when he sees a terrorist in a wheelchair?
RC-XD incoming.
Guess what song this is from:
"I'll cut you into little bitty pieces,
Or freeze you till your blood runs cold,
Or stab your till' you heart stops pumping.
I'm here to realize your wish from what I'm told."
How do you fit a baby into a shoebox?
A blender.
How do you get them out?
Tortilla chips.
When the school shooter finds you and you think you’re gonna die, but he remembers the time you gave him a pen.
When you’re playing dead and the school shooter starts unbuckling his belt and you hear him say, “This boy always had a fat ass.”
How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thin you slice them. -Hope Marie Lawson
what did the pedophile say to the kid?
"Roses are red, my name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van."
What do you call a 5-year-old with no friends?
A Sandy Hook survivor.