Memory jokes
The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve. It was an apple, but with extremely limited memory. Just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.
What leaves a bigger memory than a passionate kiss?
A stab wound.
1. My phone battery lasts longer than your relationships.
2. Oh, you’re talking to me? I thought you only talked behind my back.
3. My name must taste good because it’s always in your mouth.
Why couldn’t most people remember 9/11? Because it flew over their heads.
What does a cow say when he remembers something?
"I have deja moo!"
If you laugh your a legend <3 have a downy day
Tell a woman she's beautiful a hundred times, and she won't believe you. Tell a woman she's fat once, and she will remember it for the rest of her life because elephants never forget.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
9/11.
9/11 who?
You said that you would never forget!
I'd tell a joke about my abusive dad, but I only remember the punch line.
My dad is like Hurricane Katrina. I haven’t seen either since 2005.
Today I learned humans eat more bananas than monkeys. -- I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey.
When you go to an orphanage for a field trip: When the workers said, "I remember you as a kid."
I'll never forget my grandma's last words, "What are you doing in here with that hammer?"
My fondest childhood memory was building sandcastles with my grandfather. That is, until my mom took the urn away from me.
In memory of Michael Jackson, Starbucks and various other establishments are introducing the Jackson tea. It's 50 year old water, with a 7 year old tea bag.
In memory of Michael Jackson, various ice cream companies are introducing the Jackson Chocolate ice cream. It is either 50 year old cream mixed in with 10 year old nuts, or 7 year old vanilla ice cream with 50 year old chocolate drizzled on 4 year old tiny nuts.
Patient: "I'm starting to forget things."
Doctor: "Since when have you had this condition?"
Patient: "What condition?"
Q. What's a 9/11 survivor's least favorite bagel? A. Plain.
What do you say when a handicapped man forgets something? "He knew it like the back of his hand."
Comedy is so woke these days. You can't make fun of any disadvantaged group.
Except people with Alzheimer's. They'll just forget you made the joke in five minutes anyway.
How do goldfish know when to eat?
They don't. They have a memory span of 3 seconds.