Violence jokes
This kid lost Kahoot, so he shot up the school.
Which is redder: a baby or a red car? It depends on how the baby was killed!
My friend said she was tired of seeing me every day.
So I pushed her off the side of a cliff.
School shootings are everywhere. In ice cream shops and even the woods.
What does Sonic say when he's bored?
Punch an orphan, what are they going to do, tell their parents?
What's the difference between an orphan and a watermelon?
One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer; the other one is just an orphan.
On my signal, I would like you to drive onto the pavement (sidewalk) and run over my ex-wife.
Win a free ride in a police car! Just pick up a knife and use it!
Kid: "THERE'S A SHOOTER IN THE BUILDING!"
Shooter: "Oops."
When you're angry, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
*World War 2 going on and then stops.*
Me: "I guess you would say it was a gory-ious battle."
Mom: You can't die in the living room, David, so you can stop stabbing and shooting yourself.
David: I will surpass Kakarot!
Jordan: *dead on the living room floor*
What is a terrorist's favorite song?
"Pumped Up Kicks."
How do you make a mime cry?
You kill his family right in front of his stupid face.
Steps to win a Nerf war:
Step 1. Take out Nerf bullets.
Step 2. Load hollow points.
Step 3. Win!
I just read that someone in New York gets stabbed every 52 seconds. Poor guy!
It’s like Sonic always says, “If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?”
I killed a man in '94.
Weed: *gets hit by his own power*
Cop: Wait, shouldn’t you be resistant to your own element?
Weed: Are you resistant to bullets when you shoot a gun?
I woke up one day to find handcuffs on my bed. Turns out, the girl I drugged yesterday escaped.