Violence jokes
Oh my god, she hit me with a bat,
'Cause she was transgender.
What kind of rape victim has a shower ten times a day?
The type that gets raped a lot.
It's impossible to rape a rapeist because rapeists want sex.
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?
Nothing you haven't told her twice already.
Jake had sex and broke her hymen, guess he’s Jake the ripper.
Why did the rape victim cross the road?
Because she was a chicken!
Rapist: Rape doesn't hurt anybody.
Victim: (Implied response indicating the rapist is wrong)
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how many you throw.
A gay rapist saves a female rape victim, then rapes the rapist.
Roses are red, my name is Dan...
TDM, I have a gun, GET IN THE VAN!
What's meaner than taking candy from a baby?
Throwing the baby off a cliff.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
What’s better than swinging a dead baby in circles over your head with a 5 foot rope?
Stopping it with a shovel.
My best friend was recently gunned down in a drive-by shooting and died a virgin, but he wasn’t buried one.
When Chris Brown heard he wasn’t the only one to hit a woman.
Stop the cap.
Weed: *gets hit by his own power*
Cop: Wait, shouldn’t you be resistant to your own element?
Weed: Are you resistant to bullets when you shoot a gun?
I just read that someone in New York gets stabbed every 52 seconds. Poor guy!
How do you make a mime cry?
You kill his family right in front of his stupid face.
What is a terrorist's favorite song?
"Pumped Up Kicks."
Steps to win a Nerf war:
Step 1. Take out Nerf bullets.
Step 2. Load hollow points.
Step 3. Win!