Go up to someone and say, "I'm sorry for your loss," and see what they do.
Ups Jokes
What type of bee can't make up his mind?
A maybe.
When you are sitting outside at school and this boy comes up to you with a rock in his hand and says, "Do you know where Mrs. Stewart is at?"
I have to say that Halloween is my favorite day...
Every time they see me, kids and mothers run away...
I don’t have a costume so please don’t reprimand...
When I open up the door, I’ve got my penis in my hand.
A wife and husband go to a barn. The husband picks up a goat and says, “Look at this pig I have to sleep with every night.”
The wife says, “Honey, that’s a goat.”
The husband replies with, “I was talking to the goat.”
I was doing a race, and I started after everyone 'cause I fell, but when I got up I realized I couldn't even race, not because I was behind, but because I can't go straight if I'm gay...
What is an emoticon's favorite dessert?
An emochi. (search up mochi)
Well, we started off by ripping up ALL of the decking.
Abandon ship!
This morning I woke up, then took a bath with some chocolate mud. At first, when I turned the damn flossers on, I noticed it wasn't water. It was all chocolate mud, and now my body is all chocolatey.
Son: Mom, can I tell you something?
Mom: Yes, of course, honey, what's up?
Son: Ok, you have terrible jokes! They're not even funny!
Mom: Well, I made you.
A few days ago, I phoned up the spiritual leader of Tibet, and he sent me a large goat with a long neck. Turns out I phoned Dial-a-Llama.
It's tricky when you're both a moth and a sea captain in charge of a ship, but up ahead, you see a lighthouse.
Bf: Babe, do you love me?
Gf: Of course, why do you ask?
Bf: I heard that your mom passed away, and I went to pick some roses for you to try to cheer you up, and then I remembered why I went to the garden.
A can of worms popping up and down inside a lot of people and a girl ate the can of worms: It was her imaginenation.
I saw two really tall guys. I walked up and said, "I didn't know we still have the Twin Towers!"
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your smile's warmth, Lights up my view.
So you're offended by midget jokes? C'mon, grow up!
What is George Floyd’s best pick up line?
"You're breathtaking."
I hooked up with my German girlfriend, but I kept on getting distracted when she kept yelling her age.
One way to not pick up a girl is to say, “Are you an American school because I wanna shoot kids into you?” I tried it on a girl, and she is now terrified to come near me.
How was I supposed to know she was already pregnant?
