Gym jokes
Why did the gym close down? -- It just didn't work out.
How do you get to the Hogwarts gym?
Go through the dumbbell door.
How names were named.
"I have to go because my tailor is at the gym where he will chase coal before dawn."
"SAY THAT AGAIN. SO MANY GOOD NAMES!"
Okay so not a joke but like- There's a fucking noose in my school gym.
What’s a rapper’s favorite exercise?
Heavy bars.
Yo mama so fat, she needs to go to the gym.
Why did the pirate go to the gym?
To improve his booty strength!
I don’t know why I go to the gym. Being healthy is dying as fast as possible, and I really want to speed that shit up.
Why did the rapper join a gym?
To get those SICK BARS.
What’s a rapper’s favorite EXERCISE?
Flexin’.
Why didn't the teddy bear want to go to the gym?
Because he didn't want to get ripped.
Why do some couples go to the gym together?
Because they want their relationship to work out.
At gym class today, my friend made this song:
🎵 I’m a Barbie girl, I am fantastic, my boobs are plastic!
Tired kid with asthma: "It's hard to breathe."
Gym Teacher: "That's alright."
Other Kid: "Hush!"
When your legs forget how to work after leg day, I can't climb the stairs.
Michael Myers right behind me. Runs like I'm a track star!
I asked the gym instructor,
"Can you teach me to do the splits?"
"How flexible are you?" he asked.
"Well, I can't make it on Fridays."
What is a victimless crime in the state of Michigan if you are an able-bodied man who is well-endowed, not white, and not a heterosexual male?
A white male who is heterosexual and physically disabled who is sodomized by an able-bodied and well-endowed gay male who is not white inside the men's locker room at the gym.
When the quiet kid lost a game of basketball and reaches into his bag,
other people in the gym: "Oh shit this nigga bout to shoot."
A lady weightlifter goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, I have a confession." The doctor asks, "What is that?" She replies, "I've been using steroids and....I think I've grown a penis." The doctor looks at her and asks, "Anabolic?" There's an awkward silence then she replies, "No, just a penis."
Total gym.