Travel jokes
Gwen, we can chat in 2 months. My aunt just died from COVID, and it is taking forever for us to get there to California. I love you, your boyfriend, Prince!
Where do fruits go on vacation?
"Pear-is!"
My friend misspelled "Mexico" and got here.
He sucked his sister's poop hole.
- Why is that flight waiting at 30,000 feet height?
- One tire became flat. They are changing it in the middle of the journey.
Son: Hey dad, why is my name Canada?
Dad: Because you were made there.
Mum: We haven't been to Canada.
Dad: Hol' up a minute.
I was on a plane and my mom said, "It's just a little turbulence."
And I said, "Mom, we just got on the runway!"
I asked my nan if she wouldn't mind shitting in a bucket when we went camping. She replied, "Why the fuck would I want to sit in a bucket?" So eventually she did, and I took the best shit I have ever had!
I went to China and said, "I have a big cock," so they thought I said they look like a cock. Then I realized I said it in English.
Yo mama is so stupid, when she took a trip to Disneyland and a sign on the highway said “Disney left,” she went home.
What did Columbus use to cross the ocean?
He used a bus.
- What do you call a bee who flew to United States? - "USB"
What do we call a skeleton who has a ton of travels?
A skele-TON!
Q: Why can't you run through a campground?
A: You can only ran, because it's past tents!
What is the difference between a tree and walking home from school?
Did you hear about the astronaut that stepped in gum and got stuck?
He got stuck in orbit! Hehhehe.
I did a walk walk and walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home.
I wanna go to Antarctica, but then I got cold feet.
What has two left legs 🦵 but can’t walk? An airport.
Why did the cow go to space?
To get ice cream!
Why did the Indian cross the road?
To get to the curry shop.