Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call it when a white person beats a black person?
A KKKO.
1. You can't wash your eyes with soap.
2. You can't count your hair.
3. You can't breathe through your nose with your tongue out.
4. You just tried number three.
5. When you tried number 3, you realized it was possible, only you look like a dog.
6. You're smiling right now because you realized you were fooled.
7. You skipped number 5.
8. You just checked if there was a number 5.
9. This is not my joke; all credit goes to Steps.
What's the difference between twin towers and McDonald's?
One had a drive thru and the other had a fly thru.
One day a man dies and goes to heaven. He gets there and sees a bunch of clocks. He asks Jesus, "Hey, what are the clocks for?" Jesus replies, "They move every time you sin." "This is Mother Teresa's, it has not moved so she has not sinned." "This one is Abraham Lincoln's, it has moved twice so he sinned twice." The man asks, "Where is Joe Biden's?" Jesus replies, "It's in my office-- I'm using it as a ceiling fan."
How did Hitler tie his tiny little shoesies?
With tiny little Nazis.
Why do kids like Michael Jackson so much?
Because he's made out of plastic, and that's what toys are made out of! 😂
What did the lady say to Michael Jackson on the beach?
"Excuse me sir, but you're in my sun."
What do you call a sad strawberry?
A blueberry.
What is an orphan's favorite store?
Home Depot.
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call daddy.
My eggs are just like my dad... nonegg-istent.
There is this cute Russian girl in my class, yet she hasn't asked me out for vodka.
What would be a good job for a fat person? A four-chin teller!
Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't wanna say this, but nobody cares about you.
Literally every movie:
"I love you." "I love you, too."
My life:
My 'friends': "Hey, Hailey likes you!" Him: "Wtf, I have a girlfriend, sorry not sorry." His friends: Spreads the word throughout the whole goddamn country. 😶
I don’t usually tell 9/11 jokes, they usually crash and burn.
What do volcanoes and suicide bombers have in common?
They both erupt when triggered.
My mom got a clown for my birthday, but it ended up being my sister. 🤡
I wish the grass outside of my house was emo, because it would cut itself.
Q: How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant?
A: He forgot to wrap his whopper.