Congressman jokes
A thief walks up to a man in a suit and pulls out a gun. The thief says: "Give me your money." The man in the suit turns around surprised. He raises his hands and says: "But, wait! You can't do that, I am a Congressman!" The thief replies: "Oh, sorry. Give me MY money."
An officer confronts two congressmen.
He informs them, \"I’m looking for a couple of child molesters.\"
The two look at each other, turn to the officer and exclaim, \"Sure! We’ll do it!\"
What do you call an anorexic girl with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese.
What do you call ten lesbians in a room together? Fingerhut.
What do you call two lesbians in a closet together? A liquor cabinet.
What do you call a room full of 50 lesbians and fifty congressmen? 100 people who don't do dick.
Why don't women wear miniskirts in the winter? 'Cause they would get chapped lips.
What do a cliff jumper and a gay man have in common? If the rubber breaks, they're in deep shit.
Yo mama's ass is so fat it has its own congressman.
What do a politician and a minister have in common?
Both of them will tell you anything to get money from you.
What do you get when you cross a clergyman and a politician?
A panhandler.
A little known rule: You cannot be circumcised if you are running for political office in the US.
You need to be a complete dick.
Why are Republicans supporting giving felons the right to vote?
Because their own personal jeebus is a felon!