That jokes
Yo mama is so ugly that her birth certificate is an apology.
Is your ass jealous of the shit that came out of your fucking mouth?
You should always wash your sex toys. That's why priests baptize babies.
The double slit experiment shows light particles are a wave that assemble in your presence. And you didn't even have to say a word!
God = what I hope to be.
Devil = what I can't accept.
I hope to be like Jesus, a dead martyr. I can't accept that my religion is evil.
I was reading this in class and laughed at loud, i had to clear all my history of jokes
What do cannibals call a person that is running?
Fast food.
Your hairline is so far back that my father couldn't even reach the store in time before it grew!
This anorexic girl wanted to fight me. I told her that I would roast her, but she didn't have any meat.
What do you call something that has 50 legs but can't walk? 25 disabled people!
Bro, I’m so pissed. There is always that one kid in the class who the teacher helps. I hate that guy in the wheelchair.
When a person yells, just laugh and remember that they can’t hurt what’s already dead.
If you have a teacher who is a Karen, comment what the worst thing that they did to you or your entire class. I know this isn’t a joke, but why not?
What do you call a cat that walks slowly?
CATerpillar
The boyfriend says to the explosive dude: "You're the bomb!" The explosive dude says: "Wow, that was Whitty."
My girlfriend called me a pedophile. That's a big word for a six-year-old.
Yo mama is so strict that Thanos couldn't collect the Infinity Stones until he had done his homework.
You go up to a bar and say, "Hi." He doesn’t look at you. You keep saying, "Hi." He says, "What?" Then you realize that he is the one that you stole his lady from, but then he doesn’t give you any drink. You say, "Why?" He screams at you and then says, "YOU'RE FIVE!"
What do you call an orphan that takes a selfie?
A family portrait.
I asked an orphan where his mom was. He started crying, so I said it again.
And well, that was my last day at the orphanage.
Woman gets pulled over by a cop.
Cop: "Ma'am, have you been drinking?"
Lady: "No, officer."
Cop: "What's that in your cup then, ma'am?"
Lady: "Just water, officer."
Cop: "Looks like wine to me."
Lady: "Oh my god, Jesus did it again!"