That jokes
If a kid refused to go to bed, does that make them guilty of resisting a rest?
Person: You suck!
Me: Tell that to your mom, and she’ll say the same thing, honey. 😎
Did you hear about the Boston marathon? 'Cause, well, I heard it was a blast and that it blew everyone away!
Oh Sans, you're such a bonehead! Sorry if that joke was jaw-breaking! LOL.
What do you call a Mexican that has lost his car?
Carlos!
Hey, you know those birds and lizards that feast on decaying flesh?
Oh, sorry, I shouldn't carrion about it.
If I look after chickens, does that make me a chicken tender?
What's the last thing Asians hear from their parents?
"My money is my money. Your money is my money. Your wife's money is my money. Always remember that, son."
You're so wonderful that Wonderland booked tickets to meet you!
You are so intelligent that parents come running to beg you to be their child!
Your smile is so nice that the moon shines off them.
A different version of you exists in the minds of everyone that knows you.
Yo mama so hairy that she got a haircut and lost 47 pounds.
Yo mama is so dumb that she went to the eye doctor just to buy an iPhone.
Did you know that the letter "f" in "orphan" stands for family?
Your hairline is so far back that even Hitler wouldn't shoot it.
What is the world's strongest material?
The tree that Paul Walker hit.
Chuck Norris once went to hell.
After that, the Devil only falls asleep after he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Roses are red.
Your passports are blue.
Now go stand over there,
In that very long queue!
Women be like, "Equal rights, equal pay," then decide that they don't want to do labor intensive jobs.