Ten

Ten jokes

I had a very long dream that I was eating the most juiciest, tastiest meal I'd ever eaten in my life. Then when I woke up, my wife was gone.

Teacher: “If you got ten dollars from ten people, what would you have?”

Johnny: “A new bike!”

A man is talking to his doctor after undergoing a whole range of tests to try and find out what’s wrong with him.

The doctor sits him down and says, “I’m so sorry to have to tell you this, but the results are back, and I’m afraid it’s fatal.”

“Oh no!” exclaims the man, “How long do I have?”

“Ten,” says the doctor.

“What, years? Months?!”

“Nine...”

Man with cancer: How much time do I have left?

Doctor: Ten.

Man: Weeks? Months? Days?

Doctor: Nine, eight, seven...

What does McDonald's and a paedophile have in common?

They both like sticking their meat in ten-year-olds.

Why was six scared of seven? Because 7 ate 9. Why was 10 scared? Because it was between 9/11.

What happens when there's ten people in one house and they all have to shit and there's one bathroom?

It's a motherfucking shitshow party!

Six was scared of seven because 7 8 9, so why was 10 scared? Because he was caught between 9/11.

Me running from the principal because I put ten woman's rights books in the fictional section!