Television

Television jokes

Dad

    • Kid: Dad, I want Santa to give me an iPhone.

    Indian poor dad: Son, Santa is deaf.

    Kid: No, he is not. I saw him on TV yesterday.

    Indian poor dad: Oh, actually, I asked him for a new wife. Maybe he is wearing AirPods.

    Kid: You are my Santa, daddy.

    Indian poor dad: Pull down your pants, son.

    Kid: It's not an Apple product.

    Indian poor dad: It's a banana.

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    • Work

    • It was September 10, 2001, when I stayed up watching TV shows.

    I woke up late for work at The World Trade Center, but it was burning. I said out loud, "I was late! I'm happy I was late to work! I mean... I could've di-" I was then beaten and bruised by the emergency services.

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    • Wife

    • A man is watching TV and his wife comes down and says, "I just fell down the stairs, did you not hear me?"

    Man, "Sorry, I thought it was the start of Eastenders!"

    Adoption

    • A kid is watching TV and sees an ad about adopting an animal. He then turns to his mother and says, “Do we have to adopt a donkey?” “No,” replied the mom, “but we decided to do it... we adopted you.”

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    • Hypocrisy

    • A husband walks into his house to find his wife watching Gordon Ramsay's F-king cooking show!

    Husband: "Stop watching that f-king sh*t! You can't cook to save your life!"

    Wife: "So what?! You watch porn, don't you?!"

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    • TV Show

    • I asked this disabled kid what his favorite TV show is. He looked at me blankly and said "My favorite TV show is Vegetales."

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    • Paper

    • I was going to watch the origami world championships before it folded. But it was only on paper view.

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