Technology jokes

I gave Helen Keller an Oculus and AirPods for her 12th birthday, and she hated them and me.

Yo mama is so fat when she stepped on the scale, it said, "I need your weight, not your phone number!"

What do you call an IT teacher who touches up his students?

A PDF file.

Your mom does not need the internet. She's already worldwide.

Picture of yo mama last Christmas and the damn thing’s still printing.

What does the long distance call and a Black person have in common?

They both don’t work.

BLESSEDBRIAN is the reason they invented the mute button.

How did the rapper find his missing phone?

He checked the track list.

Slade must be WiFi... because I’m not feeling a CONNECTION.

SLADE is the reason they invented the PAUSE BUTTON.

What did the rapper say when their computer crashed?

"Looks like I just dropped a HARD DRIVE!"

Why can't you buy an iPhone X?

It's too expensive.

What's the resemblance between a microwave and human reproduction?

They both make a sound at the end.

I gave an orphan an iPhone with no home button.

Guy: Hey, Siri, I failed my final exams, can you cheer me up?

Siri: What’s the difference between you and your grandma? Your grandma passed!

Yo mama's so stupid, she went to the dentist to get a Bluetooth.

Yo mama's so stupid, she put airbags on her computer in case it crashed.

I gave a deaf kid AirPods.

I tried to search stuff about 9/11 for a research project, but it didn’t work... I guess the site crashed.

Twitter just blew my mind.

I was having a blast until I ended the stream with a bang!