Velcro jokes
The man who invented Velcro died.
RIP.
You know why I don't buy Velcro items anymore?
They are a total rip off.
What is Helen Keller's favorite color?
Velcro.
How do you get a black kid to stop jumping on your bed? Put velcro on the ceiling.
What kind of birds stick together?
Vel-crows.
Velcro is such a rip-off.
What is Helen Keller's favorite color?
Velcro.
Recent attempts to defund Special Olympics have organizers scrambling to come up with more corporate sponsorship... targeted companies include:
Kleenex
Depends
Bicycle Helmet manufacturers
Velcro Shoe manufacturers
Steven Hawkings Publishers
My teacher walked up to the emo kid and told him, "I like your striped red and tan gloves." And she asked, "Where did you get them?" The emo kid replied, "Oh, I made the red stripes myself."
I was with my blind friend, and he's telling me, "Yeah, I can read braille." So I hand him a Lego brick and ask him to read it. Apparently, Lego has been hiding a dark secret from us for years; as all their bricks read, "Screw you, asshole."
Why do tampons have strings? So you can floss your teeth when you’re done eating.