Velcro jokes
The man who invented Velcro died.
RIP.
You know why I don't buy Velcro items anymore?
They are a total rip off.
What is Helen Keller's favorite color?
Velcro.
How do you get a black kid to stop jumping on your bed? Put velcro on the ceiling.
What kind of birds stick together?
Vel-crows.
Velcro is such a rip-off.
What is Helen Keller's favorite color?
Velcro.
Recent attempts to defund Special Olympics have organizers scrambling to come up with more corporate sponsorship... targeted companies include:
Kleenex
Depends
Bicycle Helmet manufacturers
Velcro Shoe manufacturers
Steven Hawkings Publishers
I used to get pushed and called lazy in school.
Man, I loved that wheelchair.
Men vacuum in the same way that they have sex.
They just put it in and make some noise for 3 minutes before they collapse on the couch and think that their wife should be really happy.
Q. What gets longer if pulled, fits snugly between breasts, slides neatly into a hole, chokes people when used incorrectly, and works well when jerked?
A. A seatbelt.