Supernatural jokes
"Kidnapping is just surprise adoption, congrats! You are now all my children! Just hop into the portal that leads to the Lust Ring in Hell!"
Here’s my hand, please hold it. That way I can say I was touched by an angel.
What do you call an orphan living with ghosts?
"Him and his dead family." :(
My friend: What are you doing?
Me: I'm making holy water.
My friend: How?
Me: I'm boiling the hell out of it.
How do you know a vampire's sick?
If he's coffin (coughing?)
What do you call an overweight psychic?
A four chin teller.
Yo mama so ugly, when she go to church they say it's a demon!
What do you call a short fortune-teller that escaped from jail?
A small medium at large.
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
Frostbite.
What kind of streets do ghosts haunt?
Dead ends.
What did the pirate say when he saw a ghost? He said, "Oh my God, it's me dead parrot!"
What kind of shit does a ghost take every time? A spooky dookie!
What did one ghost say to the other?
"Get a life!"
Why is it so cheap to throw a party at a haunted house? Because the ghosts bring all the boos.
What do you call a chicken that catches ghosts? A poultrygeist.
What goes boo in a car with no lips?
Mary is hanging out, and the angel Gabriel descends behind her. She looks behind her and says, "Jesus Christ!" and the angel Gabriel said, "So you already know."
What’s a witch’s favorite makeup?
Ma-SCARE-a!
Do you know what a reverse exorcism is?
It's when the devil tells the priest to get out of the child.
What's a ghost's favorite food?
I like some boo-ritos!