What do you call a fat psychic?
A four-chin teller.
Pokemon: What do you call a killer that uses psycho powers?
Mr. Mime!
The British Society of Psychics' annual convention had to be cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances!
Did you hear on the news that a midget psychic broke out of jail?
There is a small medium at large.
I don’t believe in reincarnation now, and I didn’t believe in it when I was a hamster.
—Shane Richie, British actor
A guy walks into a bar. He sees a hot girl. He walks up to her and says, "You're getting laid tonight." She replies, "What are you, some sort of psychic?" He says, "No, I'm just stronger than you."