Suicide jokes
I wouldn't call a Suicide Help-line even if my life depended on it.
Am I the only one here that actually tried to kill myself 15 times and failed every time and landed up in the hospital every time?
Mom: You will make me kill myself.
Me who has cut first: I'll kill myself ✨first✨!
I wanted to fall off a cliff, sadly, there aren't any cliffs near my house.
Heyyy, in the last six months, [I had] 4 suicide attempts, broke up with 3 girls, and my mom went on drugs.
What's worse than a failed attempt at suicide?
The pity looks people give you and people keep you away from 'dangerous' things.
OTHERS (MOTIVATED): If I had FLYING as a SUPERPOWER, FALLING would be the BEGINNING STAGE.
ME (DEPRESSED): OK, GOOD IDEA! LETS FALL OFF THE CLIFF AND FLY TO HEAVEN!!
What's worse than depression & suicide?
Easy: LIVING. Everyday you wish you were dead but then reality hits you in the face that you're still alive and have to suffer living.
Pretend or not pretend, we have to decide everyday even if we don't pretend no one will notice :) no one ever does :). Living is the problem to everything. We get depression cuz of it and so much. Why can't we just die :)?
Why couldn't the emo kid hang himself?
After eating through his feelings, the belt wouldn't fit around his neck.
What happened when the emo kid tried to high 5 a tree?
It left him hanging.
Hi, I'm Depraashin.
Hi, I'm rope. May I hang with you guys?
What do emo kids like to do in their spare time?
Hanging out.
What do you call my sister?
Suicidal.
if you ask an artist how to commit suicide, they will say a very creative way
Dark jokes are like a new day. Suicidal people don't get it.
It's Christmas morning, and all the decorations are done, but the tree looks like it's missing something. *grabs the noose*
When you're fighting with the emo kid and he brings his friends. Now you gotta fight the suicide squad.
What do you call an emo strip club?
Suicidal Thots.
How do you make an emo jump?
A cliff.
Why do deer stay in front of a moving car?
To commit suicide.