Don't bother; just try to live in England.
A man walks into a bar, he gets a concussion.
After 2 months of recovering, the same man rushes head first into the bar. He goes into a coma.
After 2 years, he amazingly wakes up. He then gets in his car and drives into the bar at 70 mph. He dies. Did I mention he was suicidal?
Say what you want about Hitler, he wasn't all that bad. After all, he killed Hitler.
When the teacher calls on you and asks you how many people did Hitler kill?
"One, he killed himself."
I'm going to hang myself in the bathroom at school and put a note telling kids that I'm a piñata.
Why did the man become stupid?
Cause he was suicidal, herbivorous. Ja...
I'm thinking of getting a job as a gardener--pushing up the daisies!
How did a blonde commit suicide?
She jumped from the basement window.
What do you call a depressed emo? Dead.
Murder is the same as suicide, except the other person is doing it for you.
Roses are red, I don't know why, Living is hard, I want to die.
Rowan
My dad told me I'm a failure.
I failed a math test.
Good thing there's a pole outside my house.
What do a convention of nerds and Kurt Cobain's garage have in common?
There's brains all over the place.
Go commit neck rope.
my lfe
What do suicidal people do in their spare time?
Hang out.
What did Eminem do when he couldn't get some of his mom's spaghetti?
Well he didn't make it back to recovery this time...
Why did the feminist kill herself?
Because she was TRIGGERED.
Suicidal people are groundbreaking.
