Sound jokes

What sound does a nut make when it comes alive?

Christmas!

Gregg says to his friend, who is a girl, and says, "Hey, umm, do you, umm, want to do something?"

And the girl says, "Umm, sure, why not?"

Gregg says, "Well, then we have to go somewhere secretive."

The girl says, "Umm, well, ok."

Gregg says, "Great!" So Gregg brings Sally to a tree so no one can see them, and then Sally says, "So what are we going to do behind this big tree?"

Gregg says, "Well pull down your pants, and I'll show ya."

Sally says, "Ok, it sounds fun!" And then Gregg pulls his pants down and tells Sally to lay on the ground. Then he puts his dick in Sally's pussy, and he goes up and down, up and down, up and down, and then Sally starts to moan more and more, and then suddenly a teacher hears her moan, and then the teacher sees what Gregg and Sally are doing, and then the teacher gets in on it, and both Gregg and Sally start fucking the teacher, and then the teacher moans, and then the whole school makes their own sex groups, and the whole school has threesomes...

THE END

A sad guy called "nun" is crying next to the grave of his best friend called "month". "Month" got killed by a gay guy, and after that, "nun" got homophobic.

While "nun" is sitting next to "month"'s grave, he heard a guy ask his friend: 《Do You Wanna Play A Game On?》 "Nun" got angry and he asked that guy: 《What did you just say to your friend?》 The guy answers: 《A game on, why?》

"Nun" kills the two guys.

🤔

There's a kid with loads of new firemen equipment and sees a fire engine go past and the kid asks the firemen, "Come have a look at my new gear." So the firemen go look at his gear, so then the kid says:

"I've got a helmet, a big jacket, and an oxygen tank, and a little wheelbarrow for my gear."

Firemen say: "Why is there a rope tied around a cat's balls?"

The kid says, "So I can have a siren nnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn"

What did the trumpet say to Trump?

"Hi, fellow trumpet!"

What do cheetahs say?

"Cheese-ah!"

What's the sound that dwarfs make when they have sex?

Broken plates.

I tried to catch yodeling, but he evolved to yodingalig.

Say, "Crack my fingers."

Now say that backwards...

Why can't you hear a dinosaur clap? They're dead.

When fat people sit down at a restaurant, you can hear the chair screaming.

What instrument do skeletons play?

The Trombone!

What's the difference between someone with dystonia and someone with misophonia?

One makes the annoying noises, while the other hates the annoying noises.

How do you know when a rapper's been in the kitchen?

The microwave goes, "ding, ding!"

Why did the DJ go to jail?

Because he dropped the bass too hard!

What did the mic say to the rapper?

"Don’t DROP me, bro!"

What kind of music do elves listen to? Wrap music.

Freddy: I'm coming for you >:)

Me: God, no, help!

*game notification pops up with very loud sound*

I told my sister to make a noise and hear what she said... "Cuckoo coo chew." #Owl🦉

ooOooOooOwwwwwwwwwnipplenipplenipplenipplenipple shat y lif.