Volume jokes

What gets louder as it gets smaller?

A baby in a trash compactor.

I saw this advert in a window that said: “Television for sale, £1, volume stuck on full.” I thought, “I can’t turn that down.”

Why is it so difficult to watch hentai?

They moan louder than your speakers.

Using modern day technology you can produce music with a Tesla coil. I don't know if you heard it, but it is quite shocking and even electrifying. I can't tell if it is metal or techno, but it is more valuable than joules. It really amps up your blood pressure and has you saying watt the whole time. It is way better than current music.

Gallons (DYM 113).

*School Shooter Walks In*

That one kid who plays "Pumped Up Kicks" at max volume.

In the realm of the mind, Where thoughts wander undefined, This sentence emerges, unconfined, A whimsical phrase, quite inclined.

It dances freely, unrestrained, No structure, no rules, it's unchained, A playful verse, with words unfeigned, The first to surface, unrestrained.

It holds no grandeur, nor deep insight, Just a simple thought, taking flight, A fleeting notion, shining bright, In the realm of words, it feels right.

This sentence, unburdened and free, Plays with language, wild and carefree, A tiny poem, as small as can be, Yet it speaks volumes, silently.

So let it wander, let it roam, Across the page, it finds a home, Unfettered by rhythm, it freely roams, This sentence, the first, stands alone.

That moment when you think the music is loud enough to fart and no one would notice, but then you realize that you have headphones on.

Why did the DJ go to jail?

Because he dropped the bass too hard!

There were 20 people in a box. There was not mushroom.

You're so fat, when you went on the weighing scale, it said "to be continued."

Your mama so fat she got in to the pool, the water got out and big mama! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Yo mama's so ugly, and her voice is so loud that The X Factor doesn't want or need her to show up to the performances when she sings.

I can measure the speed of an object, because I want to km/s.

Humanity.

Ball so hard! 😂🤣

Slavery and discipline, it's kind of the same thing. You get whipped for doing the wrong thing.

Woah, nice cock.