Sound jokes
What's the difference between someone with dystonia and someone with misophonia?
One makes the annoying noises, while the other hates the annoying noises.
Me: Ice woman diary: a witch's tin key.
Other: What? You said, "I swim in diarrhea, which is stinky?"
What does a cute deaf girl and a fire have in common?
They're both hot, but they're both quiet.
Follow me.
I heard a noise, so I'm dead.
What goes zzub zzub zzub?
A fly flying backwards!
Fruit punch sounds like the name of a gay boxer.
What's the resemblance between a microwave and human reproduction?
They both make a sound at the end.
CHABI CHABI CHAB CHAAAAB!
You know you're fucked when the speed bump screams.
I swallowed shampoo. It goes blblblblb. 🧼
What do you call a train full of gum?
A chew chew train.
When the cow goes, "moo," and sheep say, "baaa," and the bull says, "boo!"
Q. What kind of school does an ice cream man go to?
A. Sunday school!
Psst! Don't understand? Well, "Sunday" sounds like "Sundae." Get it now? Nope? Sorry. Plus, it's an ice cream homophone joke.
What happens when the music note starts to misbehave?
Then he gets into treble!
What does the beet DJ say when he's partying?
"Dance to the beet, y'all!"
I sat down to eat some ice cream. The next moment, I screamed!
ooOooOooOwwwwwwwwwnipplenipplenipplenipplenipple shat y lif.
What do you say when you hear someone tripping over at night?
Goddammit, Jamal!
How do you make a cat sound like a dog? Pour gasoline on it, then light it on fire and it will go "WOOF!"
How do you make a dog sound like a cat? Put it in the deep freeze until frozen solid, then run it through an electric saw and it will go "MMMRROWWWWWW!"
Watching paint dry sounds like a thrill compared to spending time with Slade.