Short jokes
What's wrong with 89?
You blow me and I owe you one.
Have you ever stepped foot in Stephen Hawking's house? 'Cause he hasn't either.
What does a disabled disco play?
"When your legs don’t work like they used to before."
The difference between George Floyd and Kobe Bryant is Kobe got air.
What has 2 arms but no legs?
A crippled woman with no more meaning in her life.
What do you call a country's booty?
Its bottom line.
Guy is at athletic meet. Asks guy if he is a pole vaulter.
He replies, "No I am German and how did you know my name was Walter?"
I got a horse and I named it Hermio-nae.
Why don't we keep the balls rolling?
Teacher: Tell me about the history of Tsar Nicholas (blah blah blah).
Student: How should I know, that's his story?
Why did everyone run from the Mexican when he went to the snack bar?
He said "¡Hola snack bar!" ¡Hola means hello in Spanish.
Start a RATIO chain.
A boxer talks with his fists.
Stephen Hawking talks with his wheelchair.
I'll tell you a good joke. Stephen Hawking went for a walk.
Why does Wednesday Addams never blink?
What do you say to your pony when it's being wild?
Stop horsing around!
What was George's last message to humanity before joining the others?
"I CAN'T BREATHE!"
My life is such an udder disappointment. What an udder failure!
Your hairline is so long they mistake your forehead for a football field.
On my Tinder profile, I said, "I prefer quality over quantity." I just thought it sounded nicer than saying "no fat birds."