Short jokes

Short jokes

Orphan

What is the similarity between orphans and apples?

They both get thrown out.

Kid

What's the worst thing that can happen to schools?

Quiet kids.

Suicide

Mom: You will make me kill myself.

Me who has cut first: I'll kill myself ✨first✨!

Fight

My mom tells me and my sister to stop fighting. "Mom! You and Dad need to stop!"

Life

Why am I still alive?

Pills give me stomachaches, blood makes me faint, height frightens me...

Eye

What has eyes but can't see?

Potatoes, storms, and needles.

Pornstar

"You raise me up to stand on mountains," said the dwarf pornstar on my penis.

Pool

I heard a neat little trick you can use to have a public pool all to yourself. If you blow a whistle 3 times, everyone will just get out!

Orphan

Why don't orphans go to the shops? Because when their mum leaves, she's never coming back.