Short jokes
Question: Did you know that "diarrhea" is hereditary?
Answer: It "runs" in your jeans!
When people say they get ho's: You don't get no ho's, the only ho's you get is in yo draws.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, In your presence, my love, Every moment feels new.
"Send me back, I never liked you."
Why don't Bald Eagles like fast food? It always runs away!
ISIS recently brought out a new shampoo.
Head and Shoulders!
Ariana-Chat now!
What did one terrorist say to their kid?
“Here comes the airplane!” “Here comes the other one!”
A dolphin swims into a bar and looks at the menu. He calls the bartender and orders a pint of ginger-whale.
I just wanna say thanks to everyone who favorited my jokes and commented! Thanks!
What do you call a high school student?
Alone and depressed.
What do kids play when they can't play with a phone?
Bored games.
What do ants use when they're stinky?
Deodorant.
Steps to win a Nerf war:
Step 1. Take out Nerf bullets.
Step 2. Load hollow points.
Step 3. Win!
Funny thing happened today, my dad came home from work which is weird cause he’s a suicide bomber.
I used to think 11/11 was mistakenly 9/11.
You know the saying, "Third time's the charm?"
Well, Germany lost twice.
I don't trust trees...they look shady.
What is an orange cucumber?
A carrot, duh!
I fucked a chick named Macy, but she had dyslexia. So I ended up doing the YMCA.