Jealousy Jokes

Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies.

What's the best part about plowing your cousin?

- It makes your sister jealous.

I asked an emo, "Do they get jealous when their phone dies?"

I'm jealous of your heart because it's pumping in you and I'm not.

I'm jealous of my LED lights, 'cause they're hanging from the ceiling and I'm not.

Do emo kids get jealous of their phone when it dies?

I got jealous of the zebras. Sorry, I’ll cut it out. I wanted to practice for my med school test.

Do you get jealous of your clothes when they hang from the line?

I was crying when Sasha died in AOT, I also got jealous.

A man comes home and hears his wife talking about having sex at the club. The man busts into the club with a revolver and says, "WHO TF FUCKED MY WIFE?" Well, everyone looks over and is quiet, and someone in the back says, "Mate, you don't have enough bullets."

I got jealous when my phone dies.

Royal aka ZEPHYR gets cucked daily by Tyrone.

ZEPHYR watches Tyrone give his wife the genes he could never give her. What a loser.

My boyfriend accused me of cheating. I told him he reminded me of my girlfriend.

What do you call a sandwich 🥪 full of envy?

Peanut Butter n' Jealousy! 😂

My girlfriend just broke up with me because I held a door for another girl. She said I was cheating, but the girl I helped was in a wheelchair.

The man was dangling by a string!

I was jealous the day he died.

My parents raised me as an only child, which really pissed off my sister.

I bet emo kids are jealous when their phone dies.

Why are emos jealous of light?

The lights are hanging.

I get jealous when my phone dies.