Short jokes
Do you know Imagine Dragons?
Yeah.
Imagine dragon my nuts across your face.
What is the first thing the disabled download on iTunes?
"They see me rolling, they hatin'."
Why do orphans want to be communist?
So they would have a motherland.
Why do tampons have strings? So you can floss your teeth when you’re done eating.
I know a good airplane joke, but it would probably go over your heads.
The twin towers: No, it won't.
What caused Captain Hook's death?
He accidentally used the wrong hand to wipe his ass.
Dream tweeted, and I quote, "Babies kick pregnant women all the time, but I do it one time and I’m the one arrested."
Did you hear about the cheetah who robbed a bank? He ran away so fast he almost got away with it, but he was spotted.
What do you call an Indian gymnast? Balance Singh.
You know, most people take rocks for granite... sorry.
Two men walk into a bar. You'd think the second one would've seen it.
My wife told me to be more in touch with my feminine side, so I crashed the car.
Why are cats bad storytellers? Because they only have one tail.
Why do orphans hate milk? Cause their family is still shopping for it!
What starts with e, ends with e, and only contains one letter? -- An envelope.
What do you call a German lesbian?
A krautmuncher.
They have a new line of socks for paraplegics.
They are so comfortable they can't even feel them.
I saw a man trying to rape a girl. I decided to help. She didn't stand a chance against both of us.
How's Donald Trump going to get rid of all the Mexicans? -- Juan by Juan.
What's the difference between a priest and SpongeBob?
SpongeBob asks if you're ready first.