Short jokes
A priest and a pedophile walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey Jim!"
Two wrongs don't make a right, but what do two Wrights make?
The first airplane.
KFC proudly presents the kid fryer meal where our fillets are made out of kids. 😎 1 like = more kids in our fryer.
My father said I'm too reliant on technology.
I called him a hypocrite, and unplugged his life support.
What is the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One smashes open when you hit it with a sledgehammer, and the other is a watermelon.
What’s the difference between a doctor and a pedophile?
The doctor doesn’t enjoy giving physicals.
I shot a man with a paintball gun just to watch him dye.
Click the 👍 if you hate school.
Your forehead is so large, if I drew an H on it, maybe Kobe could've landed.
What first went through Sally's mind when the Nazis came? - A bullet.
What do you call disabled people that follow politics?
A special interest group.
How do you get a fat girl to bed? Piece of cake.
Why couldn't Helen Keller eat her Big Mac?
She was too busy trying to read the sesame seeds.
I asked my wife if I could use toys during sex last night. You should've seen her face when I rolled my Hot Wheels across her tits.
A mom gave her son "the talk". Her son replies, "Wait, so there really isn't candy involved? Guess Grandpa lied."
What do planets like to read? Comet books!
A cop pulled me over and shouted, "Papers!" I shouted, "Scissors!" and drove off.
How do you cut the sea in half?
With a sea-saw.
Why is a moon rock tastier than an Earth rock?
Because it’s a little meteor.
If I place a slide on the edge of a cliff or a really high building, would going down it be considered "suislide"?
Asking for a friend.