Short jokes
Spongebob and Jacko have one thing in common.
They both routinely place meat in small buns.
I searched up self harm jokes, clean, but I couldn't find any :[
What happened when the emo went through the self-checkout?
Two beeps went off.
You're so flat, you make pancakes look thiccc.
I didn't come into the prostitution business...
It came into me.
What's My Favorite Thing About My Grandpa?
His life insurance...
Bf: What do you think about our love?
Gf: Count the stars in the sky.
Bf: Aww, it's infinity.
Gf: Nope, just a waste of time.
What do you call a sad cup of coffee?
Answer: Depresso.
How did a blonde commit suicide?
She jumped from the basement window.
I heard that Jimmy Savile never wanted to be famous... All he ever wanted was to settle down, and have kids.
What is Hitler's least favorite month?
Jewly.
Ya know, Kobe made a real impact on the earth!
I went to the store and I saw a kid with fake airpods, and I was going to tell him, "Nice fake airpods," but it was his hearing aids.
Teenager: "OMG, I’m prego, my mom's gonna kill me."
Baby: "Lmao, same"
What is a glory hole at the adult book store used for?
Campaign contributions to the Republican Party.
You know what the worst thing about gang rape is?
Having to wait your turn.
I should be ashamed of myself for making all these jokes at the expense of the disabled! After all, they can't even stand up for themselves.
What did the pedophile say when he got out of prison?
I feel like a kid again.
I know five fat people, and you're three of them.
Me: Hey, do you want to see my grandma?
Friend: Yeah, sure.
Me: *pulls out gun*