Short jokes
The ketchup told a joke. No one was laughing, but the egg was cracking up!
He is so fast that he broke the internet for the whole world when he ran.
What do terrorists do on 9/11? They have a game of Jenga.
What is the epitome of being quick on the draw?
Coming both first and last in the same round of "soggy biscuit".
Anyone want to fuck? Cause my sisters are such cunts!
Who answers the door at the peanut mansion?
The peanut butler.
If your parachute doesn't work, don't worry.
You have the rest of your life to figure it out.
This is an inside joke for my friend Caiden...
"Hey, where’d you get that paint from?" "Ha! Paint!"
You're so fat, when you went on the weighing scale, it said "to be continued."
Let's stop this, it's not funny. Oh wait, the orphans are all gone with nobody. 😂
When you're sitting by the mushrooms and you hear one say to the other "Hey, you're a fun guy."
Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house?
No? Neither did he.
I fucked a chick named Macy, but she had dyslexia. So I ended up doing the YMCA.
You're so skinny the world turns to the left!
Me: Calls 9-1-1.
Operator: 9/11, what’s your emergency?
Me: *hangs up*
What do you call a movie with kids with cancer? ... Finding Chemo.
I used to think 11/11 was mistakenly 9/11.
Why is the ocean so salty? Probably because the land doesn't wave back.
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and an airplane landing strip? Don't know, neither did my dad.
What's the difference between a Christian and a child who believes Santa exists?
Nothing. They both believe in fairytales!