“What do we want?”

“HEARING AIDS!”

“When do we want them?”

“HEARING AIDS!”

My girlfriend broke up with me because I stole her wheelchair.

But I knew she’d come crawling back to me.

To the guy in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket… You can hide, but you can’t run.

Im doing a charity bungee jump for the local disabled. Its called spastics on elastics

A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a door. And a staircase.

What did the boy with no hands get for his birthday?

I don’t know. He hasn’t opened it yet.

Why do midgets laugh when they run?

Because the grass tickles their balls.

What do you call a disabled Asian?

Sum Ting Wong

What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and the computer he’s hooked up to? – The computer runs.

Don’t let an extra chromosome get you down!

What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?

Virgin mobile.

What do you call a Chinese man with one leg? Tie won shu

What do you call a dog with no legs? – Doesn’t matter what you call him, he’s not coming.

Why has Stephen hawking’s stopped playing hide and seek with his wife? Because she keeps using a metal detector

Where can you find some of the world’s largest vegetables? – In an American nursing home.

What do you call disabled people that follow politics?

A special interest group.

What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user? – Meals on wheels.

I met a guy in a wheelchair today. His face was battered and bruised. “What happened to your face?” I asked.

“I’m a Paralympian,” he replied.

“Boxing?”

“No, … hurdles.”

What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed?

Nothing.

What is black and screams?

Stevie Wonder answering the iron.