To the guy in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket… You can hide, but you can’t run.

What do you call a disabled Asian?

Sum Ting Wong

What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed?


What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?

Virgin mobile.

My girlfriend broke up with me because I stole her wheelchair.

But I knew she’d come crawling back to me.

Im doing a charity bungee jump for the local disabled. Its called spastics on elastics

What do you call a dog with no legs? – Doesn’t matter what you call him, he’s not coming.

“What do we want?”


“When do we want them?”


A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

Why can’t blind people eat fish?

Because it’s sea food.

What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and the computer he’s hooked up to? – The computer runs.

What is black and sits at the top of the stairs? – Steven Hawking after a house fire.

What do you do with epileptic lettuce? – You make a seizure salad.

Why do midgets laugh when they run?

Because the grass tickles their balls.

A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a door. And a staircase.

What do you call someone with Down Syndrome who smokes weed?

A baked potato.

Why is Stephen Hawking a bad role model? – He doesn’t stand for anything.

my sons so ungrateful. i bought him a trampoline and all he does is sit in his wheelchair and cry all day.

I can’t stand being in a wheelchair.

What do you call disabled people in a hot tub? – Vegetable soup.