Short jokes
If someone has a gun and tries to shoot you, just say, “Hipity hoppity, that gun is my property.”
Why do orphans love McDonald's?
Because the initials are like "mother" and "father."
If an orange is called an orange, why isn’t a lemon called a yellow?
What do you call an abo with a shotgun?
Sir.
Yo mama so fat she can't walk for five seconds without sweating, causing a tsunami!
When the school shooter is getting roasted because of his Pokemon lunch box, but they don't know that there is a Glock 34 inside.
What do you call it when Neil Armstrong started cuming in space?
The Milky Way.
Read my name. 👍🇮🇪
Why'd Susie go down the slide too fast?
Because her wheelchair was good.
If you go broke, you could always rent parking garages on your huge ass forehead.
When the school shooter gives the autistic kid a glock and he shoots himself, thinking it’s a cigarette.
Dababy
What is cheetah's favorite taste to run fast?
Cheetah outta here!
Q: Why did the cow touch an electric fence?
A: Because it wanted to get electrocowted! 🐄
What does FNAF stand for? Five Nasty Ass Fools.
You and me went up to stab your father. He was out, do not pout. They are coming after.
What did the cell phone say to his wife?
"I will give you a ring."
Operation failed in North Korea, the surgeon died.
I'm a nonbinary trash can.
Why was the kid not able to cross the hallway?
Answer: The school shooter already shot him in the middle of the hallway.