Short jokes
The Twilight fanbase.
Is someone who is tardy again actually "retardy"?
What does Yoda say when he’s at the strip club?
"Dirty bitch, you are."
Did you hear Palpatine is sewing Nike?
Stole his slogan, just do it!
What do you call plane crash victims?
Down to earth people.
What type of game is Africa playing at the moment?
The Hunger Games!
Lil bro's hairline is making me hungry wit that M shape also hitten me wit that damb batab bat bat baaa.
What's the easiest way to make a glow worm happy? Cut off its tail—it'll be delighted!
What did Jessiey do?
Jump and make a explosionnnnnnnn, heyyyy gas!
If all women disappeared one day, it would be a pain in the ass.
Marriage is really educational.
When I was single, I didn't even know there was a wrong way to put a fork in the dishwasher.
A failed marriage is like an Avengers movie.
First someone snaps, then half your stuff is gone.
One spelling mistake can completely ruin your marriage.
I accidentally texted my wife, "I’m having a wonderful time. I wish you were her."
My last best man's speech was like the marriage--short, occasionally funny, and ultimately ruined by the bridesmaid.
When the emo girl is in a movie and the director says, "Cut."
How do you make the grass cut itself?
Make it depressed.
I went to a restaurant and a waiter took my order. She had two black eyes, so I ordered real slow.
Because obviously she doesn’t listen.
It's obvious Bill Gates didn't create COVID.
None of his other products are able to release new versions this frequently.
My girlfriend got COVID.
This is the perfect time to propose to her. She might just say yes because of the lack of taste.
What's an emo's favorite time of year?
Fall.