Short jokes
Why don’t I shut myself all the time?
I can only fit so many pairs of kids in my mouth and stomach at the same time.
Are you acid, cause I want to throw [you] at my face?
What do you call a gangster involved with anime? A Cuz-Player.
Did you leave your hairline at the airplane, because it's going up?
Depresso Exspresso let's be friends, please.
Guys, what do you call an un-aborted and parentless child?...
An orphan.
The emo kid's mom went to jail because the kid was hung.
The companies that made the hand gel sanitizer must be absolutely rubbing their hands together!
Why do so many kids die in school shootings? Because you're not allowed to run in the corridors.
Why can't orphans fail a test?
Because the teacher is gonna ask their parents to sign it.
What mistake did the manager of the Twin Towers make?
He replaced all the window cleaners with 2 commercial jets.
"Ring Ring! Hi, I've been needing to call you. Your hairline has been found by Dora after 25 years!"
What’s an orphan's high school nickname?
Lone stone.
Did you know that Stephen Hawking's death was an accident because he pressed "shut down" instead of "sleep mode?"
Which falls faster, a feather or an emo?
A feather, because the emos are always hanging in.
Why is it that orphans love Frisbees so much?
Because they return eventually.
"Kylin milks me all day like I'm a cow."
If you're ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Once, my father came home and found me in front of a roaring fire.
That made my father very mad, as we didn’t have a fireplace.
What's that Pokemon that evolves into macargo?
Slugma.
Slugma dick.