Chemist jokes
Why did the noble gas cry?
Because all his friends Argon.
How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?
Ask them to pronounce "unionized".
Why didn't anyone react when the king farted? -- It was a noble gas.
What is a pirate's favorite element?
Argon.
What do you do with a dead chemist?
You Ni-tro-gen!
If Silver Surfer and Iron Man teamed up, they would be great ALLOYS!
What is the chemical formula for a banana? BaNa2
Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A: If you cannot helium, you have to curium. If you cannot curium, you have to barium!
Q: What did the chemist say when he found two isotopes of Helium?
A: HeHe.
I told a chemist a joke.
No reaction.
If a king farts, is it a noble gas?
An chemist, a physicist, and a mathematician are stranded on an island when a can of food rolls ashore.
The chemist and the physicist come up with many ingenious ways to open the can. Then suddenly the mathematician gets a bright idea: "Assume we have a can opener..."
How do chemists laugh?
HeHe.
What is Ba + 2Na?
Ans. Banana.
What do you call a man with 6.022 x 10^23 dollars?
A Moleionaire.
Chemistry joke: Why did the Superman being normal people when a krypton was at him?
Because krypton is "stable."
A Biologist, a Chemist, and a Statistician are out hunting.
The biologist shoots at a deer and misses five feet to the left.
The chemist shoots at the same deer and misses five feet to the right.
The statistician shouts, "We got him!"
What do you call a Russian pharmacist?
"Ivan Astichestykov."
I would tell you a science joke, but I know I won't get a reaction.
Why are there no chemists in Africa?
Because you can’t take tablets on an empty stomach.