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How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?

Ask them to pronounce “unionized”.

Why didn’t anyone react when the king farted? – It was a noble gas.

Why did the noble gas cry?

Because all his friends Argon.

If a king farts, is it a noble gas?

Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?

A: If you can not helium, you have to curium. If you can not curium, you have to barium!

What is a pirate’s favorite element?


I told a chemist a joke.

No reaction.

what is the chemical formula for a banana? BaNa2

I told a chemistry joke there was no reaction

If Silver Glider and Iron Man teamed up, they would be great ALLOYS!

An chemist, a physicist, and a mathematician are stranded on an island when a can of food rolls ashore. The chemist and the physicist come up with many ingenious ways to open the can. Then suddenly the mathematician gets a bright idea: “Assume we have a can opener…”

Q: What did the chemist say when he found two isotopes of Helium? A: HeHe

What do you do with a dead chemist?

You Ni-tro-gen!

What is Ba+ 2Na? Ans. Banana.

Chemistry joke: Why did the Superman being normal people when a krypton was at him? Because krypton is “stable”

What do you call a man with 6,022 x 10^23 dollars? – A Moleionaire.