Short jokes

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Leaf. “Leaf” who? Leaf my house, or else you will regret it. You don’t live here, you dumb idiot! ?!

Tried making 9/11 jokes, but none of it kept falling apart.

Your mom is so stupid that she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.

I didn’t know how to fasten my seatbelt. Then it clicked.

Your hairline is so pushed back it looks like Will Smith slapped it back.

Your hairline's so far back that Usain Bolt had to run 50 miles away from you!

Did you guys know that Chancellor Palpatine is suing Nike?

Apparently, the company stole his slogan: Just "Do It."

What did the plane say to the towers: "Can't go over it, can't go under it, oh no, we got to go through it."

I have an addiction to cheddar cheese, but it's only mild.

Before you leave that marriage, remember that one innocent 🐐 goat was killed for your traditional marriage. 😔

I know this isn't an orphan joke, but I didn't know where to say it, so yeah.

I threw a nut at the allergy table and screamed, "YES, TRIPLE KILL!"

Me: Y’all should start calling me 1943.

Friend: Why?

Me: 'Cause I’m going through my own Great Depression.

Your mom is so fat that when she went to the dentist, the man said, "One at a time."

Why doesn't the U.S. Government play Clash of Clans?

Because they lost two towers already.

What does Buzz Lightyear and an orphan's parents have in common?

They go to infinity and beyond.

My teacher called me beautiful. I hate when she lies.

Your hairline goes so far back that Crown Burger was Crown Sandwiches.

"I have a three-head."

"I have a four-head."

Bald people have a seven-head.

What do you do when your man doesn't like fruit jokes?

Let the mango.

Why are orphans bad at basketball?

Because no one is there for them to pass [the ball].