Short jokes

Short jokes

Orphan

Why do orphans like to be robbers in cops and robbers?

So they will be wanted.

Sheep

Why do New Zealanders have sex with sheep on the edge of cliffs? They push back harder.

Pilot

I'm a pilot and my boss told me to fly people to New York, so I flew them to New York and hit the towers. That was a tragic story.

Suicide

I be ready to commit suicide.

But when it comes to jumping out my window, I'm scared ash.

Cannibal

What does a cannibal ask for when leaving a restaurant?

"Can I have a bodybag?"

Friend

Your friend lost his left arm, and after getting out of the hospital, you ask him if he’s OK. He says, "Yeah, I’m all RIGHT."

Wheelchair

I robbed a person in a wheelchair. He cried and said: "You can run, but you can't hide." I ran, and I never saw him again.

Man

What do you call a crippled man? Alex keating hahahahahahahahahahahh!

Incest

My family is lucky I was born so smart. Every time my Dad is struggling at work, he always turns to me when he needs to get ahead.

Orphanage

What do Bob Ross's painting and the orphanage have in common?

They're both filled with happy little accidents.

Laugh

When a person yells, just laugh and remember that they can’t hurt what’s already dead.