What's so similar between a pregnant 14 year old and the sperm inside her? They're both thinking, "Oh shit, my mum is gonna kill me!"
Sperm Jokes
Hi, welcome to David’s sperm bank. You jack it, we pack it. How may I help you?
An attractive man and a blonde meet in an elevator.
"Where are you heading today?" the man asks.
"I'm going down to give blood."
"How much do you get paid for giving blood?"
"About $30."
"Wow," says the man, "I'm going up to donate sperm, and the sperm bank pays $100."
The woman, slightly annoyed, gets off the elevator. The next day, the man and woman meet in the elevator again.
"Fancy meeting you again. Where you off to today?"
"Sperm bank," she mumbles with her mouth full.
How do you know when you should tell a heterosexual woman to stop sucking your dick?
When there is blood coming out of your dick instead of sperm.
How can you tell if a heterosexual man has been using a computer?
There is sperm on the screen.
What do orphans and sperm donor kids have in common? They don't have dads.
"_____ abortion clinic, you rape it, we scrape it.
_____ sperm bank, you spank it, we bank it."
Bro, tampons look like sperms, and they go up your coochie.
How do you know if you have a high sperm count?
She chews before she swallows.
Wanted: Sperm donors. Please come quickly!
Why does a heterosexual man swallow the sperm of another man after he has given him a brojob?
Because of the cream filling inside, just like the individually wrapped cakes of Hostess Twinkies.
Q: Why was the gay man fired from the sperm bank?
A: He got caught drinking on the job.
What does the receptionist at a sperm bank say as clients leave?
Thanks for coming!
WOULD YOU RATHER:
Eat 20 lbs of cow s**t?
or
Drink a gallon of sperm?
Q: What type of mother gives their daughter sperm? A: A furry mother.
Why did the sperm cross the road?
I put on the wrong socks this morning.
Q: Why did the Queer get fired from the sperm bank?
A: He got caught drinking on the job.
Why did the sperm cross the road?
To fuck the chicken.
Took my receipt to the sperm bank so I can get this comeback.
What do sperm say while just in?
"We need to go deeper."