Short jokes
Where do Sith get their clothes?
At the Darth Maul!
Why didn't the skeleton play football?
His heart wasn't in it!
What's the difference between a homeless person and a car?
Only one gets fuel.
What knight is never wrong?
Sir Tain.
Why did half of the world not see Avengers: Endgame?
Because half of them were Thanos snapped in Avengers: Infinity War.
A man says, "I'm flying!" He realizes he was pushed out of a plane.
Did you hear about the dead artist?
Too many strokes.
What did grandpa say before he died in the hospital bed?
"Boy, could you put my phone on charging?"
My brother can't wait for spring... he wet his plants!
Sadly, blind jokes are cruel. A kid at my school was punched the other day for being blind.
Sadly, he didn't see it coming.
How do you know if you have a high sperm count?
She chews before she swallows.
Why did the plane crash?
Because it was being flown by a loaf of bread.
What did the dentist say to the butt?
"That's the largest cavity I've ever seen!"
If you boil a funny bone, it becomes a laughing stock. That's humerus.
One day my girlfriend and I were just hanging out and she needed to tell our dad that we were going out.
They asked me to speak at this funeral, and I said, "Of corpse!"
Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/8.
Why are colds such bad robbers?
Because they're so easy to catch.
Roses are red. Sunflowers are yellow.
Your mom is so fat she looks like a marshmallow.
Five out of six people agree that Russian Roulette is safe.