Short jokes
My brother can't wait for spring... he wet his plants!
Sadly, blind jokes are cruel. A kid at my school was punched the other day for being blind.
Sadly, he didn't see it coming.
Guy is at athletic meet. Asks guy if he is a pole vaulter.
He replies, "No I am German and how did you know my name was Walter?"
Why do orphans always get picked on?
They can't run and tell their parents.
What pants do you wear to church? Hole-y ones.
Mom! I think that dad is sleeping.
Mom: No, honey, I killed him.
Stop copying each other, fucking losers!
What do you get when you cross a stick and a dog? A run away joke...
How can you tell if Google is a girl?
It makes suggestions before you finish your sentence!
What did the plug hole say to the plug? "We are so in sync."
What do you call a virgin kid locked in a room with a pedophile? Past tense.
Uber driver: .........
Me: .........
Uber driver: .........
Me: 5 stars.
What’s a Muslim’s favorite car?
A Citroën C4.
What is 3 feet tall and sits at the bottom of children's beds?
A: Garry Glitter's boots.
What has eight legs and doesn’t rape children?
The Jackson 4.
Q. What is the most endangered creature in India?
A. The baby girl.
What do you call a retarded fruit?
Mentally in-pear-ed.
What's the difference between a feminist and a pig?
There isn't one; they are both the same thing.
Like if you're voting Trump 2024! WOOOOO!
What did Santa Claus get Paris Hilton for Christmas?
He raped her.