Short jokes
What does Michael Joseph Jackson say when little boys walk away?
"Give in to me-hee-he!"
Enough with the Hitler jokes. They make me Fuhrer-ious!
Why does Adolf hate golf?
He ended up in the bunker.
You're so fat you need butter to get in the car.
Marry or don't marry, you will regret both!
You are so white even Nippon Paint tried to sign you!
How do you kill a spider?
Just get an autistic person.
I was in a wheelchair for a few weeks last month.
I went through a super traumatic experience, and I *wheely* hope I made a good *roll* model!
Friend: Did your tattoos hurt?
Me: Nah, not really.
Friend: What did they feel like?
Me: 7th grade.
Friend: 😶😶😨😰😰😰😨
What do you call an alligator that reads maps? Navigator.
Are you mixed? Cuz you're half fine, half mine 😏
Why did I trip over your foot?
Because you were so short I couldn’t see you!
I asked a European what do you call Karens in your country? He said, "American women."
Not to brag, but I can forget what I’m doing while I’m doing it.
"Yo mama so fat when she got buried it took them all the trees on Earth for her coffin."
"I only want to play with your daughter. It was okay yesterday."
Hi! Welcome to Papa John's abortion clinic, where yesterday's meat is today's treat. How may I be of service?
Your mom is so fat, she looks like she ate the marshmallow from Ghostbusters.
When I saw someone jump out of one of the towers, I yelled, "Do a flip!"
How do you know when a woman is going to have a black baby?
When she takes the tampon out, all the cotton is picked.