Short jokes

Best way of abortion?

Beyblade abortion.

LET IT R.I.P.

My friend lives in a caravan park. His parents named him Money because they thought it was a type of currency.

You're so poor, you only got 2 jokes.

October 1, 2017 is when the Mandalay Bay became the Mandalay spray. Thank Steve for that.

No matter how big the jar, there is one thing that can never fit inside it. What is it?

I didn't break my back in the accident, thankfully.

But I can break yours today, hopefully.

"Ouch!"

"What's wrong?"

"I stepped on a screw."

"Are you ok?"

"I'm in ex-screw-ciating (excruciating) pain!"

What's the difference between my ripped jeans and my arms?.

None.

Are you a dog because you're a fucking bitch?

Are you a rope? Cause I'm tryna put you around my neck 😏

I want a bigger couch.

Why? You're going to be in the kitchen most of the time anyway.

What's the difference between an orphan and an Egyptian?

Egyptians have mummies.

If George Floyd was in the new little mermaid: Under da knee Under da knee Counterfeit 20 Drugs i took plenty Now i can’t breathe

They call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me poor and ugly.

Mia: I'm pregnant again, Paul. I can't wait for you to come home.

Paul: I got a tree to hit on the way.

Who's the closest family member to Paul Walker?

Answer: The tree.

I love the word legs.

Wanna help me spread the word?

Why do animals cross the road?

Because it is funny, do you say "dogs" and "cats?"

Spell "attic."

Okay. A-T-T-I-C. /a titi/ tata. I see.

Why are there no Africans on cruise ships from Africa to America?

Once again, they don't fall for the trick!