Short jokes

I traveled through time to get my dad back.

I failed because I was 1e21 years off.

What’s the difference between milk and the air?

At least the air will always be there for me.

Freddy: I'm coming for you >:)

Me: God, no, help!

*game notification pops up with very loud sound*

I can make a living with the "Treat Yo self" budget.

Yet I can’t use the "Help yo self" budget.

I was falling down the stairs at my local clock tower.

I somehow broke more than 206. I broke 342!

Osama Bin Laden thrown in ocean!

People who helped with the Twin Towers destruction: ...

American people: We will throw your teabags in the ocean!

British: At least our towers didn’t fall. 😎

My boss found my permanent record at the orphanage, and he’s mad. I got fired...

I know a lot of people hate tapeworms, but they will always have a special place in my heart.

Your momma is so fat that when she egged the Twin Towers, she threw a airplane on accident.

If 9/11 happened again, I want to share a selfie of me flying that plane.

When the airplane saw the Twin Towers, it said, "We can't go over it, we can't go under it, we can't go around it, guess we will go through it."

What went through the heads of the people on the 142nd floor during 9/11?

The 143rd floor.

Only a true MHA fan would understand.

Here’s what I did to the kids at the orphanage. I dropkicked 12, lit 10 on fire, comboed 9, punched 3, and murdered 1.

I just had the worst gig of my life! I told yo mama jokes at the orphanage.

What do you call an Indian in a shower?

A cleaner.

If you swallow gum, it will make your poop bouncy.

I'd make an emo joke, but that would be cutting a little too close.

Best way of abortion?

Beyblade abortion.

LET IT R.I.P.