Short jokes
What do you call a person with only one arm?
Half-assed.
Why did the scarecrow get promoted?
He was outstanding in his field!
Why was Helen Keller's belly button bruised?
Her boyfriend was blind too.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.
This person has Down syndrome.
Ya nan!
What is the difference between Dray Dray and an overrated footballer called Pogba?
I guess Canada's national igloo is melting because of global warming.
Why do hospitals have fans?
To keep the vegetables fresh and cold.
How do you make a builder cry?
Kill his family.
French fries don't come from France; they come from Greece.
And the lord said unto John, "Come forth and you will receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.
Why are white teenagers the best for the army? They are good at shooting things up.
How were tire swings made?
A tire said, "Goodbye world," and hung himself.
What do you call two Mexicans having sex? 50 Shades of Brown.
What did the Nazi order from Wendy's?
Two number NEINs.
How many gay guys can you fit on a bar stool? Four, just flip it over.
What do you do with a frozen vegetable?
You wait for it to thaw.
"I told my kids not to spend all day at a computer, but then I realized I do that myself."
Why did the boy shoot the clock?